Breaking a bottle of champagne on the side of your new ship means you’re about to make your first sea voyage.

Breaking a bottle of champagne on the side of your new car means you’re about to make your first call to the insurance company.

tillyouandiseethesun:

this isn’t even a problem

(via onlylolgifs)

orlandobrones:

samwinchesters-killerpenis:

conor-cymex:

paigefillyr:

riverdanceinhell:

so you know how everyone is always like lol illuminati 666 hail satan the south will rise again etc.

well today i was like hey what exactly was the illuminati anyways? and i

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oh

Next time on: I didn’t know I was a member of the Illuminati.

Plot twist: Tumblr is literally the Illuminati.

am i in a cult

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(via el-zazz)

(via sporktar)